I know, it's not what you are thinking. Who in their right mind wants their husband to love someone else more than themselves? Very few people, I'm guessing. I want you to hear me out though. Because my husband puts someone else first, our marriage thrives. Because he puts someone else first, he's a better husband and father. Because he loves Jesus more than he loves me or our kids, he's able to love us better. For the past ten years (six years of being married), I've watched Rem grow in his love for The Lord and I've also watched him grow in his love for me. I honestly throught that when we got married, he couldn't possibly love me any more than he did right then. I was so incredibly wrong. The more he grows in love with Jesus, the more our marriage thrives. The more I grow in love with Jesus, the more our marriage thrives. I don't think this is a coincidence. I think this is how God designed the marriage relationship to function. When we are focused on living a life like Christ, we are able to treat others with the same love that Jesus would. Yes, we fight but I watch my husband, time and time again, forgive me and say I'm sorry. What better picture of Christ's love? We will fail time and time again but he's always there , willing to forgive and giving us the chance to start again. There are days I fail miserably at being a loving wife, but I see God's grace through the way my husband treats me when I've failed. Most days, I don't feel like I've done anything to deserve a husband that treats me with the love and respect that mine does, but then I remember that I've done nothing to deserve the gift of eternal life that Jesus has offered me either. It's by Gods grace that I've been given both of these amazing blessings.
As is look back on the past six years of marriage, I can clearly see Gods hand at work in our life. When we decided we wanted to spend forever together, we were all of nineteen years old, both still living at home. We knew nothing of the "real world" or the stress of having to pay our own bills. We knew nothing of having babies wake us all hours of the night or making decisions about job offers. We were hopelessly in love and wanted nothing more than to be together. We had no real plan for what our life together was going to look like, although someone bigger than the both of us did. He had a life planned for us that honestly, I never would have imagined growing up. I didn't dream of living twelve hours away from my family. I didn't dream of being a pastors wife. I had a very clear cut dream of what I wanted, but obviously God makes better plans than I do. He has blessed me far more than I deserve. I am able to look back and see that every time I thought I was coming to a closed door, it was actually just God opening up another door I hadn't even seen before. I was too concerned with my own agenda to actually look around to see that God had the right plan all along. When Rem called off our engagement a month before our original wedding date, all I saw was a door slamming me right in the face. What I see now is that I was so stubborn and set in my own ways that I needed a door slammed in my face so that I would let God lead me where He needed us to be. When we found out we were pregnant after just six months of marriage, and Rem still two years from getting his degree, all I could think was "how are we going to do this." God already knew what we needed to provide for our growing family and Rem was offered an interview as a youth pastor soon after we found out we were expecting. Time and time again, God has provided for our family in ways we would have never expected. It amazes me daily to see his grace in our lives.
Six years have come and gone in the blink of an eye. Two precious babies have been born and have grown up overnight. A college degree has been earned and five and a half years of being a youth pastor is under my husbands belt. Life has happened. Some days it's crazy and busy and hard and overwhelming. Some days it's crazy and busy and hard and beautiful. It humbles me to realize that this is the life God has chosen to bless me with. It's not perfect and somedays it's downright hard, but Gods grace has been there through it all and I can't imagine it any other way.
Thank you God for giving me a husband that always puts you first, that works hard, is trustworthy, compassionate, and is such a selfless father. He's far more than I deserve but am so so so thankful thy he's mine! Thank you for your grace day in and day out in our marriage. Without it, I don't know where we would be. I absolutely can't wait to see what year seven brings for our family but I know that without a doubt, Gods plan for us, no matter what, is the best plan by far!
Happy anniversary to my precious husband. I love you more than words can say and am so very thankful for your presence in my life. Here's to many many more crazy, busy, fun, challenging, amazing years!
